I guess the rediscovery - maybe even the discovery - of my self-confidence was a gradual process.

In October 2008, I walked away from the career I loved and left the UK to live with my new boyfriend, who later this month will become my husband. I've previously written about some of his problems and how life can be with him. I love him very much, and I knew very well what I was letting myself in for by moving here.

He gets me. I mean, he understands me almost as well as I understand myself. We have a scary amount in common for two people from separate continents and two different generations, he with a long military career behind him and me at the near beginning of my career. We both tend to depression. He has AS; I have enough traits whether I do or not to understand the whys and hows of the way he reacts to some things, why he behaves how he does at times and to know that it is not me that he is reacting adversely to. We're both secure enough in ourselves to appreciate that the bad times are not as bad as they were separately, and the good times are so much better. We centre and ground each other.

The really grotty days are the days when we are both depressed and miserable and grumpy - Saturday was no blooming fun! *g* But that was Saturday, and things are brighter today.

I went back to school to relearn and improve my German. I passed an exam. I made new friends, friends who don't know my history and don't care about all my baggage. They do care, but it wasn't there in the background to influence them. I realised that, hey, I am a likeable person, I can function all right in a foreign country and get along with strangers in a different language.

Then I started to lose weight. Quite a lot of weight. Suddenly I feel as though I can achieve anything. I am more confident, happier in my own skin and finally feel as though I can be the me that I was meant to be. For a life-long depressive who is still on medication, I have realised that I am happy, or if not happy then content with my life.

It could be better. There is always room for improvement! But I love and am loved, I have friends, I am improving my body and my mind and I actually enjoy life. For the first time in my life, I like myself. That feels very weird, but it is such a good feeling!

If you are struggling the way that I was, I really hope you find the key to unlock your potential, too. Be kind to yourself, and put your mental and physical wellbeing first, above all things. If you are well and happy, those around you will be. If they aren't, well sod 'em!